Talk:Yusuf al-Mu'taman ibn Hud

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ZachUnivOK-[edit]

Hey-

Here are a few thoughts on how you could improve your article, take them or leave them.

First off, give us a splash paragraph- a hook. It would be the first text you type, before the first heading, that way the reader can stop and check if this is the article s/he meant to open before diving straight into the body of the article.

I see that there are not an abundance of pictures available for Yusuf al-Mu'taman ibn Hud. But perhaps you could compromise and add the pictures on the Mathematics in medieval Islam page. Speaking of that page, you currently have arab and mathematician as separate hyperlinks to separate pages. It seems fitting to link them to the Mathematics in medieval Islam page. You can steal the coding from this comment if you would like it would look like this; Arab Mathematician.

I’d throw some brackets on Kitab al-istikmal maybe someone will come along and write an article for it.
The first paragraph of the Biography section just cuts off mid-sentence, what is up with that? I want to know what happens after “…very few ”?

I would give “Ceva’s Theorem” its own sub-header.

I realize that your quote in the first sentence recognizes where it got its info from, but where did you get that quote from? You need to cite that.

And at the very end of that last paragraph, I don’t know if there is supposed to be an in-text citation. Maybe check that out.

Overall,[edit]

I felt a bit tossed around while reading this article, could you add some contextual type stuff? Meaning, filler that would help me understand what went on in Yusuf al-Mu'taman ibn Hud’s time. Like; "this or that Hadith was transmitted to or through him," or "here is what his neighborhood was infamous for," or really just about anything you can find to paint a picture of who this guys was other than the strict facts of his accomplishments.

I hope you can use some of these thoughts to help finish up this article for class.

Good luck,

-Gaurd.vanforlife (talk) 19:58, 25 March 2014 (UTC)[reply]

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