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User:TParis/Politics

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My take on politics:

  • Democrat: Give a man a fish
  • Republican: Teach a man to fish
  • Libertarian: Give, teach, or do nothing. Whatever you want to do.
  • Narcissist: What do I get out of doing anything?
  • Randian: Do with the fish what makes you happiest
  • Communist: Divvy up the fish so we each have an equal share
  • Anarchist: Everyone is responsible for their own fish
  • Capitalist: We can negotiate on the price of a fish
  • Bureaucrat: For a fish 0.0 to 0.273 lbs, file form F in triplicate. For a fish 0.28 lbs, file form Q. What? Your fish is 0.278 lbs? You'll need to put it back in the water until it either loses or gains weight
  • Socialist: Everyone takes off a small portion of their own fish to be shared with those who cannot fish
  • Unions: Anyone who wants to fish must give us half to represent you to the fish
  • Feminist: I can fish as well as any man
  • Radical Feminist: A man telling me I need a fish is offensive
  • Humanist: Anyone can fish if they tried
  • Men's Right's Activist: Why am I always expected to fish?
  • President Bush: We caught one fish, mission accomplished!
  • President Obama: Let's take bigger chunks out of the fattest fish. It won't hurt him any
  • PETA: None of you should eat fish
  • Pacifist: Will everyone calm down? Let the fish live in peace
  • Wikipedian: Let's have a four week discussion to come to a consensus what to do with the fish
  • Achmed the dead terrorist: I kill you, then I eat fish
  • Fish: You guys keep arguing, I'm out of here